Showing posts with label Plotting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Plotting. Show all posts

January 25, 2013

Pax and pinking the Marines

I like to think of myself as "Not Evil - just easily Lead"


America's First Sgt Major... "Just saw this in my Supply office: "No Marine! No!"

Pax's offhand comment on photo... "So true... he must be punished.... (digs out the musk sticks and the postal boxes)"

One thing lead to another which lead to an address.. with the results being -



I wasn't *utterly* heartless and made sure the parcel also contained one pack of Tim Tams and some Caramello Koalas... 

So Marine Cpl Foster - where ever you may be - apologies from Downunder.

Can I send you something else to take the Pink from your memory?  Perhaps an Apocalypse Kitten? (I hear they are all the rage in certain Marine Households!)

 
 
For more adventures with Marines and Musk Stick Lollies - check out A1SM's posting on an earlier taste test adventure

August 22, 2012

Pax is feeling challenged

well.... at least I THINK these could be used as challenge coins... perhaps? maybe?

Although I only have a very hazy idea what a CC is - and perhaps these are too big and too heavy.

Anyshinycoin (as my friend Coffeypot would say)

I originally ordered TWO of these - with the thought that I would keep one for my collection and use the second as a future blog prize.

Through an accounting glitch I have ended up with FOUR of them (all duly paid for after I contacted the supplier and advised them they had oversupplied, but I loved them and would keep.. oh and here's my credit card info for the other two...)

Front & Back of the Medallions
Got them from HERE
They are quite heavy... but oh so pretty.  [Australian Army Rising Sun insignia on the front - Australian flag & slouch hat on the reverse]

And seeing that I now have THREE extras... do you think this is the sort of thing that would be of interest to someone that is currently serving "DOWNRANGE" - or would it be one more piece of heavy junk for them to drag about?

One of them WILL be used as a Blog competition in the next few months for my regular readers.  I just need some inspiration on what sort of competition to run.

Hmm....

Limerick comp?  "There once was a Pax from Downunder..."

Haiku perhaps? "Winter Pax rejoices..."

A Nordic Ode? "Bright the day, and kindness surrounds..."

Ehh... or maybe a Military Mentor might make mirthful merriment magically materialise (aka... someone send me a Silly Photo to Caption please!)

Seriously I am open to *most* suggestions

March 8, 2012

Caption This!

Due to the wonderful forbearance of a Zombie-destroying, World-saving Blog-writing friend, I have been permitted to post the following photo for my newest "CAPTION THIS" competition.

Doesn't he look wickedly competent with that?
(and not fluffy in any way what so ever - honest!)
 The Rules:-

Write a CAPTION for this photo

Must be PG-13! (if you feel that using a rude word is required then bleep it out - let's think of the potential that one day my Mum might read this)

You do NOT need to be a regular reader of this blog to enter (sniffle... but you COULD stick around and read more - just saying)

You can be from anywhere in the world.

If you win - you will need to supply me with a mailing address. I promise to hold the information safely and never share it beyond my Post Office.


If you leave your entry under the "Anonymous" tag - please be sure to add your name or nickname at the bottom so I can track you down later should you win.


If you find that Blogger won't let you post a message or worse - it disappears into the ether - then email me directly (you can find my e address under my profile)

The Winner will need to contact me by last day of March 2013 at the latest with their mailing address or there will be a redraw.

The Winning Joke will be judged on or about the 18th of March

Oh and the PRIZE(s)?


Because I know that some of you DON'T DO CUTE AND FLUFFY then it will be a Winners choice.

Prize the 1st - a Teddy Bear dressed in Australian Camo pattern

Prize the 2nd - a Vintage (as in it's mine and I've had it for a few years) Ball cap bearing the word "LIBRARY" (made in the fashion of F.B.I raid caps) AND a bayonet shaped USB stick*

Oh... and if you plan to win the Camo-Ted AND do Nefarious things to him (i.e Camo-Ted's excellent range adventure OR Womp-Rat-Ted and the T-16) then you have to take photos or film and SHARE.

And GO!

*If the winner is actively serving downrange then the USB stick can be seperately shipped to any State-side address since I don't think it's on the "Allowed to Post" list

**edited to correct a few small "typos"...

February 14, 2012

Mwahaha! Pax Plots (again!)

I have just sent off another "Cup of Kaboom" to one my Soldiers' Angels adoptees - I *love* these cups!.  Clever mixture of utter silliness and maximum Coffee storage!

Hoping he likes it!


And in Potential Pax Plotting - I know someone that would shriek in horror at receiving the next item

Possibly more bearable than some of the Customised "Hello Kitty" combat weapons at this site - http://www.loneleeplanet.com/2009/12/top-7-hello-kitty-combat-gear/

Have I mentioned lately just how much FUN I get from sending the weird and the wacky downrange to my Adoptees?

And for my friends that are fearful of my continuing existence - relax!  They've first got to GET to Australia and then track me down to retaliate (snickers)

December 16, 2011

Pax goes Nautical

So how about a competition to help make the Merry Season even Merrier?

And let's make the prize a Nautical one - how about an Australian Navy cap!

Bought it from HERE
So what do you need to do to win this very nifty hat?  - Glad you asked!

Tell us (in the comments section below) your best Military related Joke or Short Story

The Rules:-

Must be PG-13! (if you feel that using a rude word is required then bleep it out - let's think of the potential that one day my Mum might read this)

Can be a joke or story that happened to you - or one you are simply retelling.

You do NOT need to be a regular reader of this blog to enter (sniffle... but you COULD stick around and read more - just saying)

You can be from anywhere in the world. All that I ask is that you respect that this item represents my Country's military, and is to be treated as a prized possession.


If you win - you will need to supply me with a mailing address. I promise to hold the information safely and never share it beyond my Post Office.


If you leave your entry under the "Anonymous" tag - please be sure to add your name or nickname at the bottom so I can track you down later should you win.

The Winner will need to contact me by 1st of January 2012 at the latest with their mailing address or there will be a redraw.



The Winning Joke will be judged on or about the 25th of December

December 5, 2011

Pax poses the question

While other bloggers are neck-deep in the dramas of the world - either preparing to fight zombies or reporting on new Pentagon cost savings, I have been more concerned about clarifying a vex'd question.

To wit......

What Military service DO the Penguins of Madagascar really belong to?

To a casual observer - the answer may appear to be "Navy" - after all their Leader goes by the name of  SKIPPER

Dashing, debonaire crew-cut wearing Alpha Bird

My Source for many things Navy (and strangely many things Hollywood - what can I say - he's diverse!) writes this about the term :- Skipper is the term for the Commanding Officer of a naval command. Also known as the CO, the old man (not to his face), or the boss.

But wait! - the Junior member of the team is called PRIVATE
Cute cuddly and a bit clueless
My source advises "A Private is a rank in the Marines, Air Force, or Army"
Strange... and worrying... is this perhaps a multiforce special ops team?

Their On-the-Spot Science man - Kowalski - known as the 2IC - nominal rank of Lieutenant

Never afraid to try SCIENCE!
At last but not least - their Ka-boom-in-ator

Able to regurgitate C4, detonators and anvils at call.
So there we have the team - one gung-ho commander (nominally Navy); one Private (could be Marine... but he's a bit too cuddly); one Science Boffin (drafted Civvie?) and their Trigger man (*definately* a Marine - his blade work is excellent)

Let's see them in action...


Questions remain......

Answers are required.....

Comments welcome!

November 23, 2011

Mwhahahah

Pax has been plotting (again)

[enjoys the fact that there is a core group of people who cringe whenever I mention the "P" word]

And in other news... I have now 3 adopted troopers and a small group of Marines to send goodies and letters of silliness too (newest adoptee acquired last night - hopefully he will be fine with the Goofy Australian's antics)

And sorry Coffeypot - still no Navy adoptees (I just can't seem to get "lucky" there). Maybe you should seek out one and send them my way?  Just don't mention my abiding fear of deep water and it will be bonza :)

So... just as a general question and not implicating myself at all... how DOES one ninja-proof an apartment?  Are Nightingale floors still all the rage?  How about a pressure-activated trap door / oubliette combination at the front door?

Mmmmm.... oubliette....

October 29, 2011

Last chance to enter the "Caption THIS" competition

One day to go before the judging of the Caption THIS competition


Mirthful Marines - always a scary thing!!

You still have time to enter if you are swift!

and the prize is a wonderful Australian Army cap

Competition Rules -

*Entries can come in from anywhere in the world (you don't have to be a regular reader to enter!)

*Winner will be required to supply a valid postal address (I will hold that address secure & private)

*You may make more than one entry but try to keep them relatively polite

*Competition closes on the 30th of October. Winner will be mentioned on the Meepings and has one week in which to contact me or a redraw will occur.

***edited to add - If you find that blogger won't let you leave a comment to enter the competition please email me your interest @ paxford AT gmail DOT com and I will manually enter your name and Witty Caption into the draw***

October 22, 2011

Caption Re-cap

So it's been brought to my attention that I may be offering the wrong sorts of prize incentives in my recent competitions.

Seems that the Rough-Tough-CreamPuff crowd favours more this sort of THING

So if you know of someone that really wants to enter the CAPTION THIS contest but thinks the prize is just a bit too *too* - let them know that I'm willing to offer alternatives  (sweet caring soul that I am)




October 18, 2011

Caption This for Pax and Prizes

Some of you may remember my scientific experiments with the colourful Australian sweet (aka candy) MUSK STICK.

If you're new here - or need a refresher - check back on the reactions of one of Test Subject Groups at America's First Sergeant's website; or Navyone's recounting of his exposure.

Go ahead... I'll wait...

..................

..................

................

..................

Back?  Now aren't they all a Happy Happy Bunch! (snickers)

So how about I lift one of those photos (with permission of course - let's not have any grumpy A1S's about) and we can do a Caption Contest. 

Caption Me!!!


*Competition Rules - entries can come in from anywhere in the world.

*Winner will be required to supply a valid postal address (I will hold that address secure & private)

*You may make more than one entry but try to keep them relatively polite

*Competition closes on the 30th of October. Winner will be mentioned on the Meepings and has one week in which to contact me or a redraw will occur.

***edited to add - If you find that blogger won't let you leave a comment to enter the competition please email me your interest @ paxford AT gmail DOT com and I will manually enter your name and Witty Caption  into the draw***
Oh and the prize?

How about an Australian Army cap?

Rising Sun symbol in Gold and in relief on the brim and buckle
Available from HERE.

And in case you are wondering how it looks in person - here is the delightful Coffeypot modelling one that I sent him as a gift

See! Even the Navy guys like them :)
 and........ GO!

September 19, 2011

Be Vwery Quiet...

Evil Pax and her minions are hunting a marine


Say your Pwayers, kiddo

... Ring Ring.... 
"Hello! This is the A.C.M.E supply shop - how can I help you?"
"Umm.. yes... I need the tools to capture an A1S marine"
"Hmm.. our look up guide describes those as VERY difficult to capture - would you prefer our "how to capture a Ravening Yeti" guide instead?"
"No... no... it really needs to be this one particularly pesky person"
"Well.. we *could* send you the 'Instant bear pit' kit [launches into jingle "One flip of the lever and he's no smarter than an average bear"]
"Ahh.. could you throw in one of those Handy-Dandy illudium Q-36 explosive space modulator's as well"?
"Certainly Miss - those come with a portable A.C.M.E medic station. Would you like to take out some A.C.M.E insurance too?"
"...."
"Now will that be cash or charge?"

September 16, 2011

Stand back! Pax is doing Science!

Breaking news...

dateline Australia... 16th September 2011

Sadly it would seem that my on-going Science experiment has had a wee bit of a set back.

Marines recoiling from the Insidious pinkness
The Finding that "1 in 10 American Military Members don't hate Musk Sticks" has been disproved by my latest set of Guinea Pigs Happy Volunteers* (aka members of the United States Marine Corps)

I am told that a full account of the up-close-and-Pink encounter will be shortly posted by my 'on the spot' assistant** (he that is proffering the Sugary Sweetness in the photo above)

Hmm.. so that is now the USA Army, Air force, Navy & USMC.  Any suggestions on who I should find for my final control group?

Oh and I am so very tempted to get myself on of THESE t-shirts.

I wonder if they make any in pink?

Oh well.. back to the Lab. My Data must be carefully massaged compiled for the final presentation.

******

*Volunteer (n.) pronounced un-witting vic-tim
1. A person who performs or offers to perform a service voluntarily

**Assistant (n.) pronounced Coll-ab-or-ator. 
1. a person who assists or gives aid and support

August 25, 2011

Pax'ing the Pinkness

The Suggestion has been made to me (by persons who shall remain unnamed) that I seem to take an unholy delight in the tormenting of bewildered Americans via the insidious pinkness of the Musk Stick sweetie.


In my defence I must protest that my very first sending of the infamous MS – back in mid 2010 – was as simply another odd Australian candy (aka sweet / lolly) to send to my adopted soldiers.  It was reported back to me by the nice young Military Police trooper “C” as
 "I finally know what the colour pink would taste like - let's never do THAT again!"

Wondering if this was a simple aberration of taste (after all He IS from the same nation that thinks combining Jam and Peanut paste is a delicacy), I sent off some more MS’s in the next troop treat parcel to go out (to Pv2 J of the USA Army).  J's response to it made me laugh so much that I made THIS blog post.  J never did explain what he meant by the “priceless reaction” from his battle buddies – but it marked the real start of the “supply to as many of my unsuspecting American friends / Soldiers’ Angels adoptees as possible” plot.

Wait! Did I say Plot? 

No no – NOT a plot!

It is a scientific experiment I swear! 

And I now have hard data from my research that 9 out of 10 USA troops have THIS reaction
Airforce guinea pig... lovely lad!
There is of course that 1 in 10 that is obviously a misplaced Australian at heart (happy beaming smile at the thought) – these brave souls are then moved on to the Vegemite part of the taste experiment and the Hard data compiling begins all over again.

Oh and notice that I pinpointed mid 2010 as the start date of my MS generosity? – well it seems that Izzy (one of my very first 2009 adopted soldiers via Soldiers’ Angels) is feeling left out of the fun.  We’ve remained friends over the years and as he has a birthday very soon (next week even) one of the items in his “Fun Aussie treats” birthday box are a pack of the Pinkness.  I’m rather hoping there are action shots as he “shares” his bounty with his family and friends.
Why yes... I AM a sharing caring sort – thank you for noticing! 
(Hmm... maybe I should drop Minnesota OFF the “places I plan to visit” list?)
Sadly, however, my research is incomplete – so far I have only received scientific data from troops of the USA Army; the USA National Guard, and the USA Airforce.   Can you name the two USA Military Forces missing from this list?

However all is not lost - there are still two “experimental’ Packets of the Pink out in the wild – and so far uneaten (I believe). 
One pack is held by our illustrious America’s First Sergeant of the United States Marine Corp.  I begin to suspect that A1S may be hoping that the Pinkness will succumb to his steely-eyed stare of doom before he is required to taste any (Hah!).

The other is in the possession of Navyone who has been kind enough to offer up his sea-going taste buds for the test .

The fate of my experiment is now in your hands, Oh Gentle Readers, – So just drop over to their web-blogs and “encourage” them to participate.

Just a simple remark left on their latest blogs - something polite and to the point would work...
"Hey *insert blog name* so what about those Musk sticks?"
Do it for SCIENCE! 

Do it for the Pink Stuff! 

Do it for Queen and Country!.. .whoops.. you USA guys are a Republic, right?... okay do it for MY Queen and Country!  

Oh and don’t forget to tell them that PAX sent you (sweet angelic smile)


*** If you would like your very own Military person to send treats and friendship to,  then please consider becoming a member of Soldiers’ Angels 

For the cost of one parcel a month; one letter a week and the opening of your heart to a person deployed – you too can reap the benefits of knowing that you CAN make a difference in another persons’ life.

August 19, 2011

To Plot or not to Plot - that is the Pax-tion

(with oh so many apologies to the Bard)


To plot, or not to plot, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The carrots and sticks of outrageous fortune,
And by way of illustrations....
Carrot

Stick
One of these things is not like the other....
It's recently been suggested that I need to get a "normal hobby"...

August 3, 2011

Veni Vidi Coniuro (Pax goes Latin)

Veni Vidi Coniuro - I came, I saw, I plotted
Primary Plot - Failed....  I guess Defcon One will have to wait for now - it appears that a timeline miscalculation will mean that birthday present for adoptee #2 will not reach him prior to his "go no mail/go home" date.

Which is a sad sad thing as I had taken great pains to find him his very own squeezable cootie ball (for fun and team sharing - as they do in the marine corps I'm told :D) Oh and a copy of this very educational book too.


You can also buy it from HERE
I guess I will now have to send a copy off to someone else, just so they can report back on just how easy it IS to make your very own flamethrower  (very important information for when the Zombie Apocalypse befalls us)

However Secondary Plot has been dispatched via my local Post Office today - time line for delivery...
hmm.... tricky....  10 to 12 days airmail to reach the USA (being no doubt intercepted by both Australian and USAian Customs) and then on from there via the Military mail system to somewhere not ending in "STAN".  

I'm sure the recipient will be delighted with the items within (and probably ECSTATIC when he discovers that no Aussie Sweets [aka candy] have been included).

And I am now utterly exhausted - this creative plotting sure does take a lot out of you (all that skulking about and pretending to be sweet and nice... so tiring!)

I'm now off to make some dinner, answer some emails and perhaps adopt another USA service person (there are over 1900 on the waiting list).  If any of my Happy Readers have the time (an hour or so a week is all) and the funds (not that much $$$ required - paper & envelopes & stamps to send a letter a week / goodies from the local stores for the once-a-month parcel) and the inner-kindness (if you exercise your IK then it grows tenfold!) then please consider becoming a member of Soldiers' Angels - they really do strive to make a difference in the Troops morale.

And now I leave you all with the very important question - Ubi est mea anaticula cumminosa?

Pax